Solid.

I only ever wanted
Sweetness
That was never offered,
Never wanted to
Defend
Against tempers
And tyrannical siege.
I only ever wanted
Gentleness
That was never present,
Never wanted to
Feel the void of
Love’s deficit
Like a collapsed star
Removing what was Me
From the dry and
Hollow husk
Of me.
I only ever wanted
Tenderness
That told me that
I was desirable
And which stoked inner flame;
Never wanted to be sealed
In a vacuum,
Extinguishing
Every desire and daydream –
Containing me as
Some exotic wisp of air.
I only ever wanted
To feel supported
By steady measured
Consistent
Care;
Never wanted to feel
Mishandled, used, and
Expected to carry the
Weight and burden of
Big talkers’ empty promises –
Lies that cheated a future
Of ease and enjoyment
And bountiful fare.
And so, I build
On firm foundation
All that I thought
I’d find:
Solo,
Solid,
Slow and steady;
Emerald gaze set
To future mirage
Materializing
With grace
Manifest effortlessly.

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